I grab a bottle and take a long gulp. It’s almost empty now; the only thing that shuts my brains down, if only to a limited extent. When you pace around an empty apartment alone, you start to think about things you really just want to block out. For a second, it’s way too quiet, but in the long run, alcohol can’t wash over matters of the heart. I’ll ask again: Why did you leave me?

I look at the time. The plane should have left by now and your new life is waiting for you at the destination. You always talked about leaving this place, only that time, you meant us together. This time around, you chose you and I’m still here, pacing around our empty apartment. The bottle is filled with air now and it’s not even afternoon yet.

The walls are staring at me, cold and plain. I stop my feet and focus on my breathing. “Not guilty?” The walls ask me. My breaths are heavy as I smash the bottle into one of them. The clock strikes twelve and as it becomes disturbingly quiet again, I know I have to face you.

I open the closet and there you are, hanging lifeless like a piece of clothing, dripping like an eave gutter after rain. “Like I would ever let you leave.” The afternoon sun gives your blood a magnificent shade. You look like an angel, or a saint to me and I can’t remember you ever indicating more beauty than right this moment. Your cold lips meet my warm ones. “I love you.”

The sun and the moon were competing for our attention in turns and as days passed, I held you close to me. You are nothing but skin and bones now, and I am just a heart. This is the way it was supposed to be. My eyes feel heavy and as I close them, a distant tune starts to play. I think that the girl from the upper apartment has started to play the piano again.

Your eyes open the same time as mine do. It’s all quiet, but it feels all right and I can’t tell you how much I’ve missed that smile. The light is shining upon you and it’s not even afternoon yet. No blood, no dripping, just light. We’re more than skin, bones and a heart now, as you take my hand and we go through a tunnel that leads us high into the infinity. You walk me out into our new life. And what a shining light.

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